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Mom copy

A few months ago I went shopping for a computer with my dad. When he pulled out his wallet to pay, he flashed a photo at me and asked if I wanted to see his girlfriend. There inside was a copy of this picture—my mom in her beehive days. Remember the beehive? Marge Simpson may be your earliest memory of the beehive, but for some of us, it goes further back than that.

In remembrance of Mothers Day, I asked my mother what she really wants her adult children to do now that we’re grown. Feel free to take Mom’s advice. It’s never steered me wrong.

A mother’s wish list

Be happy. There’s very little your mom can do about your happiness once you are grown. You are independent enough to figure that out on your own. Build strong relationships. Be faithful in marriage. Learn to be a good parent and friend. Have a spiritual life that takes care of your eternity. This is the stuff of lasting peace.

Be thankful. Appreciating what you have is the gateway to happiness. A heart that is always yearning, striving and craving is not truly grateful. When you are focused on lack and deprivation, you will be yoked with a very heavy burden. Dwell on your blessings. Learn to live resourcefully and within your means.

Stay healthy. By the time you reach the age of 18, your mom has invested a lot of time and money in keeping you physically well. Why would you want to throw all that away by eating or drinking too much, engaging in risky sexual behavior or skipping visits to the dentist or doctor? When we demonstrate that we can do those things without prodding, it takes a load off our mothers’ minds.

Know when to rest. You may think your mom has no comprehension of what prevents you from getting adequate rest. She just doesn’t understand. Think about this: yours isn’t the only generation to establish a career, raise a family, manage a budget and make its way through life. Keeping yourself refreshed is part of living a productive life. You’re the only person in the world who knows when its time to sleep and how much you need. If you don’t manage your rest, be assured of one thing: your body will eventually manage it for you.

Work me into your routine. Call. Write. Pop in for a short visit when you’re in the neighborhood. Arrive when you say you will. Mothers do not like feeling that they are bugging their children by calling too often. When you include your mom in your routine, you demonstrate that she still matters––that her usefulness to you has not expired. Guys, maybe you don’t have as much in common with your mother as you used to. That’s understandable. Do it anyway. Send her clips of things she might enjoy reading. Slip a note in the mail and tell her you are thinking about her. Call her on your way to or from work. She has spent the biggest part of her life supporting the things you are interested in. Surely you can find some common ground.

I feel blessed to have my mom and we talk on the phone as often as we can. How do you keep in touch with your mom?

Life is short. Wear the good stuff.