Dressed Her Days Vintage ~ Life in yesterday's clothes

I left for Barcelona, Spain on January 15, 2017 and quietly cried into my hands as the plane’s wheels ascended above the runway. Of course I was excited; of course I was nervous. I didn’t know what to expect during my semester abroad, and the sheer amount of “unknown” that awaited me was paralyzing. Granted, I’d lived in a small, paradisiacal coastal town in Malaga, Spain, for three weeks in high school, but I had never really been away from home long-term—especially not as a full-time college student within one of Europe’s most densely-populated cities.

I thoroughly believed that my extensive pre-departure research (pretty much every search result available over this world-famous Catalonian region) would suffice. I feverishly hoped that, along with my notebook full of research notes, I would be able to rely on the adventure-seekers before me to pave the way toward a successful experience abroad.

Ultimately, Barcelona turned out to be a game of trial and error in which I constantly faced trials, and made what felt like millions of errors. By departure time in May, I could quite literally feel a newfound sense of womanhood pulsing through my veins as a result of seeing this tumultuous experience through.

The vast, wondrous and unpredictable land of Barcelona had undoubtedly changed me, and I left wanting so much more of what she had to offer. Successfully meeting one challenge after another resulted in highs unlike anything I’d ever encountered back home, and I felt a bleak sort of emptiness at the thought of ever living stagnantly again.

The truth is that—although travel is extremely rewarding and worth every potential risk—it’s hard to be an inexperienced American living abroad, and it’s simply not enough to assume that everything will somehow work out. This one in a million opportunity is worth doing right the first time.

Here’s part one of my tips for blending in when visiting a foreign country.

Don’t assume you’ll be welcomed with open arms. Tourism is a big issue in Barcelona. The image of American tourists that comes to mind for many locals are your stereotypical “spring breakers,” and locals will treat them as such. It’s important to know what you’re going up against as an American abroad.

Get familiar with the language. The best way to feel like you fit in—aside from realizing the often-impossible task of actually fitting in—is to be familiar with the language. All you really need is “simple” comprehension (not fluent, but not beginner level) of the native language. This will not only help you identify your surroundings and understand foreign texts such as menus, maps and signs, but will also aid in the process of local acceptance. It’s a huge gesture—and one that will massively distinguish you from the average tourist—to speak to locals in their native tongue.

It won’t, however, grant you a single perk (nor should it) to waltz in and stay within your comfortable confinements while operating beneath an entirely different set of expectations. In other words, if you plan on treating a foreign country like an extension of America, you’re not going to get the full experience. Although learning a new language is difficult, challenging and an opportunity that a lot of people can’t afford, if you really want to get the most out of traveling abroad, having a grasp on the language will get you far and wide. Knowing the language ensures that vendors aren’t going to go out of their way to rip you off by charging slightly more than they would a local.

Tone it down. If you grew up in the United States in an English-speaking household, you most likely have an American accent—even if you don’t think you do. After one becomes acclimated to hearing more delicate sounding languages (such as French, Spanish, or in my case, Catalán) all the time, the sound of American English sounds like—to put it gingerly—nails on a chalkboard. If you truly want to blend into a foreign country, and find yourself within any sort of confined space (metro, small shops, restaurants, etc.), speak as little or as quietly as possible to limit unwanted attention. By the end of my trip, I was able to distinguish an American’s presence by the sound of their laughter. Now, imagine what it’s like to hear American English from unattuned ears.

Be as inconspicuous as possible. I made sure to never travel in large groups of Americans, ESPECIALLY if we were all students and blatantly appeared to be such. Avoid carrying or displaying backpacks, textbooks, clothing with school logos, and other items. By traveling in these cringe-worthily obvious groups, you’re basically putting a big, flashing light above your heads that says, “Target us. We’re ignorant foreigners.” After only about a month, it made me extremely uneasy to even have one or two Americans traveling by my side. Out of safety reasons, I began to prefer to keep to myself and live life as an inconspicuous fly on the wall. As result, I eliminated almost all of the unwanted head turns, stares and whispers that I got before adopting this personal rule. Flying under the radar is NEVER a bad thing as an American abroad, and it’s in your best interests to remember that.

Practice caution with valuables. When out in public, I tried to keep my back against the wall (if possible) so that pickpockets’ couldn’t target me, especially within confined, hectic and populated spaces like the metro. Pickpockets’ are often so slick and professional that you can’t feel or detect the fact that your belongings are being tampered with in the first place. I made sure to always keep my eyes and ears alert, constantly searching and scanning the perimeter for any unusual developments as I went about my schedule each day. It’s an odd transition to go from feeling (relatively) safe when you’re walking around in the U.S., to constantly feeling like someone is out to get you while abroad, but rest assured that the paranoia eases as you take more and more steps to thoughtfully adapt.

Don’t feel inclined to give another stranger the benefit of the doubt. If you have a gut feeling that you’re being targeted, or could be, listen to yourself. I highly suggest never putting your trust in strangers, and always taking your belongings with you. If you’re a student and intend on studying in public domains, don’t leave your laptop out and backpack sprawled open if you temporarily leave the area. Pack everything up, and only leave behind items that you’re willing to lose, like writing utensils and notebooks. When traveling via any sort of public transportation, don’t fall asleep and expect to wake up with all of your money and valuables still intact. It’s wise to not fall asleep or let your guard down anywhere except your home base—and even then, I’d still encourage a slight sense of wariness.

Be street smart when you’re on the move. An appropriate demeanor while walking around is absolutely crucial to your safety and well-being. Always, always, always look confident and assured of yourself, even if you’re the farthest thing from it. As my grandmother Nana said throughout my adolescence, “Fake it until you make it.” Don’t ever show others your hand of cards. If you have to physically force yourself to look at ease when, on the inside, you’re melting into a puddle of fear, do it.

There’s actual psychological evidence to prove that the concept surrounding “Fake it until you make it” is real. Refuse to let on that you’re afraid—even if someone is quite clearly following you, unrelentingly staring or whistling at you to get your attention. Stay strong. The second that someone senses vulnerability or weakness—especially in a foreigner who clearly doesn’t know the lay of the land—you become an easy target for practically anything. Keep your head up. Literally.

For me, it helped to never leave the house without a pair of sunglasses—I could do as I pleased without fear that my eyes would give me away if confronted in an awkward situation. The comfort and safety that sunglasses provided truly helped me navigate unfamiliar streets, sounds and sights.

Having pepper spray tucked in my bag at all times also didn’t hurt my sense of comfort when out walking alone. I never had to use it, but I was happy and reassured to have it just in case.

Headphones are a total lifesaver. Listening to your favorite songs as you take in all of the new sights and surroundings makes you feel like you’re starring in a movie. Besides that, conveniently pretending like you didn’t hear someone’s catcall is always a good trick to have up your sleeve.

Don’t walk around with your phone in your face, looking at maps, quite obviously acting lost. Staring nervously at a map while backtracking and stumbling in the same general area for five minutes will blow your cover. You don’t want people to know that you’re a foreigner while in a foreign country—you just don’t.

Therefore, by quite obviously looking lost and consequentially marking yourself as a tourist, your belongings and safety are in jeopardy. It’s not a wild assumption to think that tourists carry a lot of valuables and cash on them because, stupidly, most do. While abroad, I didn’t use my iPhone as an actual phone out of fear that it’d get stolen. iPhones aren’t the norm for cell phones in Spain as they are in the U.S., and they really stand out because of it. I didn’t want to have to deal with losing all of my data while in a different country, so I bought a cheap, local phone and a contract-less mobile plan to better assimilate and be able to use maps more overtly.

I don’t recommend mindlessly scrolling on your phone or texting while walking out in public either. Staying alert does not mean checking Instagram. Unless you want to run the risk of being pickpocketed, it’s crucial to keep your valuables tucked away and out of sight at all times.

Be wary of the political tensions that exist in other countries. Although Barcelona is technically a part of Spain, now more than ever, the Catalonians and Spaniards are divided over a referendum for Catalonia to become independent/autonomous from Spain. Both sides of this debate are very hostile towards each another, and compromise is seemingly unheard of. Educate yourself on these political differences before going abroad, and remain neutral in public settings.

For your safety, steer clear of any and all political demonstrations, and absolutely do not take sides.

Don’t offer your opinion, join in conversations, act like you know what you’re talking about, or get involved in business that doesn’t pertain to you. It’s better to just sit back and listen when a local brings the topic up—they actually live there, and the referendum would directly impact their lives—not yours. This goes for any inquiries about American politics too. Keep it brief. Keep it general. Keep it moving.

Rachel Auten is an Indianapolis writer who recently graduated from DePauw University, where she studied Spanish and writing. This is her first guest post for DHD Vintage, and I’m grateful for her travel tips as I contemplate a trip to Paris next fall.

What advice do you have about traveling alone as a woman, either domestically or abroad?

Life is short. Wear the good stuff.